It’s the little things in a day that can put a smile on your face–or summon inner turmoil rooted in some strange personal trauma or preference. It’s all about balance right? ‘It’ meaning the secret to the mighty universe and how it all works. It makes sense, then, that for all the trivial things that bring great joy, there are silly small things that can cause insurmountable rage.
I like to find as much humor in the latter as possible. Because, if I can be off balance in anything, I’d like to intentionally tip the scale towards the positive. So, let’s share a chuckle at all the things that drive me nuts–or manifest happiness for no sensical reason. Let silliness prevail!
The Little Things
There are a vast array of important issues needing attention in the world–my slumped sock inside my boot is admittedly not one of them. However, if you catch my over-animated face during such an event, you might conclude I am plotting someone’s graphic demise. Fear not, I am not a violent creature… unless of course, you manhandle my bread.
Don’t squish the bread! I’ve been raised to obsessively protect precious carbs like chips and soft, delicious loaves of bread from harm–carefully putting them in the top compartment of the shopping cart, and on the conveyer LAST–so they end up back on the top of heavier items after bagging. Then, making sure they’re placed safely in the vehicle for the journey home. (Another reason every vehicle should have a milk nook to prevent a loose gallon-ball situation.)
After checking dates, and picking the perfect loaf of soft indulgence, and protecting it like a mother lion, it irks me to no end when the checker manhandles the goods. Like, really? WHY?!
Squished bread represents all my crushed hopes and dreams. The deformed toast, sandwiches, and slices just depress my soul.
THIS JUST IN: MY SISTER IS A MONSTER.
This is actual footage of how she consumes a peanut butter sandwich.
If you didn’t know, we weren’t raised together–which is what makes us a magical mess. This is clearly just a mess. I was unaware of her heinous bread abuse until I started writing this post.
Milk Ring Cereal
Whoever opens the milk first, dispose of the frikin’ ring! Recycle, upcycle, wear it around your nose, or do whatever you please with this irritating dairy noose. These can be used in several crafts or as a means to prevent smooshed frosting–another peeve.
Sticky AF Labels
When you’re just trying to be green and upcycle a multi-use plastic container, and the infernal label appears to peel off nicely and then decides it’s just a clingy liar. This causes homicidal rage, complete with sticky fingernails. No good deed–No. Good. Deed.–goes unpunished.
Half a bottle of Goo Gone and 14 paper towels later, you realize you will now have another container that would’ve otherwise had no purpose–thus defeating your entire upcycling efforts. ALL WAS FOR NAUGHT. Just go to sleep.
Also, why do some food brands feel the need to adhere temporary seals with super glue from NASA? This crusty struggle is easily avoidable; thank you, Skippy, I appreciate you.
The last pour from the box will inevitably turn your milk to a paste unless you carefully strain the dust from the bottom of the bag. Proceed with caution.
As someone who struggles with ADD, I get it. I’m not a teacher and can only imagine how irritating it must have been when every kid in the class brought in a fidget spinner. However, for some, fidgeting helps focus the mind. So, to transition this post from the peeves to wonder section, I’d like to introduce the Squishy Cat.
These adorable little creatures (they also come in pandas, bears, frogs and a variety of other shapes) could replace fidget spinners across the globe. They’re not as distracting and don’t create any noise, even when dropped on the floor. Although, they do have sort of a foul scent. I’m not sure if it’s a brand thing or just the nature of these stinky little beasts. In any case, they’re quite irresistible, and my kids have already thieved them all from my grasp.
Just as the little things get under my skin, random, seemingly meaningless things can bring on lasting joy; like when January 1st lands on a Monday. This should be law. It’s an extra fresh start when the new year begins on the first day of the week.
New Shampoo and Conditioner
Am I the only one that plans their entire social life around this transition in chemical goo? That first wash with a new shampoo–my gawd, it’s like a guaranteed GREAT hair day. It’s like my locks are suddenly bouncing in the honeymoon phase of a new relationship.
If I know I’m going out, I’ll switch shampoos just for the night to induce this phenomenon.
Face Masks that Result in Baby’s Butt Softness
Jen and I did an entire post on face masks that you can feel working, and I just found a couple to add to the list. The one I’m so beautifully exhibiting in the photo above is amazing. Be warned, the Anthony Deep Pore Cleansing Clay face mask for men stings pretty much immediately. But, after the first couple of minutes, it feels almost cold. After ten minutes, you can wash it off with warm water, and your skin is left smoother than ever. The back of the bottle reads “Developed for men. Borrowed by women.” Fair enough–I already use men’s deodorant, I may as well just switch over all my beauty products.
Before I get too hasty with purging all women’s hygiene products, I’d like to introduce an exfoliating treatment I got in my last FabFitFun subscription box. ExfoliKate® Intensive Exfoliating Treatment by Kate Somerville also packs quite a smoothing punch in just three minutes. It also smells heavenly. <Fist bump goes to Kate.
Really Strong Mints
I recently discovered these little polar-packed cubes of minty freshness and now can’t leave home without them. The outer coating is like a sweet coconutty shell, and as soon as you crack it, it’s as if you chomped into winter itself. Use caution when breathing outdoors in colder climates because WOW–it’s intensely refreshing. But nothing beats that feeling of knowing your breath is without-a-doubt the freshest of fresh.
This is Jen chiming in. I want to know how it took me over 35 years to learn the hack of using a wet brush after washing my hair. Is the wet brush a recent invention? All this time I used a pick to detangle my long hair. It takes me about twenty minutes to get the knots out of my mop with a pick. With a wet brush, my hair is tangle free in under four minutes. Who was in charge of relaying this knowledge? Moving forward, I am thankful and beyond appreciative for whomever discovered the wet brush.
Have any peeves or wonders to add to this list? Do you share any of my irritation or joy for these quirky little things?