My dad called us DINKS the other day. I had heard the word once before but had to be reminded what it meant. D.I.N.K. is an acronym for Dual Income No Kids. Couples who are married, both work, and choose to remain child-free.
Since a cutesy name has been created for this way of living, I realized that it must be becoming more common. That led me to my Google search where I found some pretty nasty articles about it. I was kind of shocked. I mean, I know people have opinions on every topic under the sun, but why would anyone on the planet (outside of our family and friends) care if we don’t reproduce? Who the heck does it hurt?
Defending the DINK Lifestyle
Of course, every couple who makes the decision to have or not have children has their own personal reasons. I will not go into all of ours in this post, but trust me, we have several valid reasons to not have our own kids. Honestly, I think more people should think before procreating and the world would be a better place. Okay, sorry… now I am being nasty, but this topic really puts me on the offense.
There is no shortage of people on this planet. In fact, the world is completely over-populated. Even if the number of DINK couples is rising, there’s still so many more couples having babies. I know several families who have five or more kids. Consider us balancing them out a bit. I don’t think the human race is in danger of extinction at this point. (For the record — I don’t care how many kids other people have, just please don’t judge me if I have zero!)
I am old enough now to know to “never say never” but, as of right now, we have no plans to have kids. This frees up our time to enjoy each other, our pets, and do whatever we want. Not all of our decisions are selfish, though. We make a point to support many charities and help out where we can. We are in the works to start fostering dogs, and plan to rescue more when we are able to.
One of the common thoughts in the articles that I read was that the DINK lifestyle is selfish. I don’t think that’s fair to say at all. I could even argue that in some cases having children is selfish. What about the people that have more and more kids just so their government check is bigger each month? You hear about that all the time. My husband and I both work, we pay our taxes, and we give back when we can.
There are many reasons that I could be called selfish, but my decision to not have a baby is not one of them. I don’t think this lifestyle choice should be automatically stereotyped as selfish. It’s really no one’s business other than the couple involved.
Are you, or do you know any people living the DINK lifestyle? Do they experience judgement because of it?
Sunday 1st of February 2015
I had no idea what a DINK was! I guess I'm a SINK, single income no kids. I love kids, but I never married & didn't feel strongly enough about being a parent to do it on my own.
Sunday 9th of November 2014
Loved this. Couldn't agree more with everything you said. Especially about the 'selfish' comment!
Monday 25th of November 2013
Just stumbled across your post! I just started a blog and part of my motivation was our child-free lifestyle choice. I have certainly experienced some of your same feeling on the topic and I'm shocked at how people react. I plan on writing more on the topic as I feel we are a under-represented group and I want to put something out there for other people who make that choice. Anyway, glad I found someone sharing some similar views!
Monday 25th of November 2013
Oh, I am so glad you came by!! I am off to check out your blog. Definitely look forward to connecting with you! :)
Wednesday 6th of November 2013
I have friends that have chose to have no kids and while I am jealous of the extra money they have, I would rather have my kids in my life. I will enjoy the day I have an empty nest though and can spoil myself!
Ashley - Embracing Beauty
Tuesday 5th of November 2013
That's crazy that people judge you because you choose not to have kids. I think it's possible to have kids and not have kids for selfish reasons but I don't think it's the norm. How do people not know that you're even able to have kids if you wanted to? People are crazy.